Groundhog Day

One of my classmates said in class tonight, "I feel like the guy from groundhog day."

I said "I wish for those days where I felt like that."

I started thinking about this on the way to my next stop (no, not home, but the library, where I currently am. I'm supposed to be doing homework.... riiiiight). Do I really feel that way? No, I guess not. I do long to have a routine again, to have the "new normal" feel like simply normal. But does it ever do to become as comfortable as I was in my corporate job? I don't think it does. If you're that comfortable, you aren't learning anything. I have learned more in the past six weeks than I learned for years previous to this experience.

The truth is that it is only benefiting me to feel this uncomfortable. That seems strange to say, but it's really true. The truth is that I wasn't living until very recently. I was existing. My fiance told me recently that my worst days now are better than my best days were then. I hadn't realized he felt that way. It makes me sad that only now is he really learning about who I really am. The happy me. The me that wants to get out of bed in the morning and get to work!

I need to remind myself that all that I'm feeling and experiencing is good, even when it feels weird or uncomfortable.